Many people think pampering and doing things solely for yourself is shameful and selfish. The ban on pleasure is brought up in us by family and society. The good news is that this approach is gradually becoming a thing of the past. About self-love, acceptance and care for their own needs speaks more and more.
But it is one thing to talk about it, and another thing to do it. Not everyone still understands what it means to love yourself. And “to love” is a verb and must be expressed in action.
to love and appreciate yourself means, among other things, to pamper yourself more often, to do nice little things for yourself, to take care of yourself, treating yourself the way a person wishing only goodness and happiness would treat us.
Let’s imagine that in theory we have learned a new principle of life, but in practice, not everyone understands how to pamper themselves? Some psychological exercises and specific recommendations will help to transfer the theory into practice.
Body care and tactile pleasures
The easiest way to start pampering yourself is with your body. If the only sensual pleasures you can think of are sex and food, then here is a list for you to “expand your mind.
Water procedures. You don’t have to go to the water park or buy a season ticket to the pool to pamper yourself. You can also “swim” in the bathtub with fragrant salt. Even a daily shower will turn from a simple hygiene routine into a relaxation therapy if you set it up properly. Choose some nice-scented shower gel, light a candle, adjust the temperature to your preference, close your eyes, and concentrate on the water currents enveloping your body. Sometimes even a warm foot bath is enough to relax and enjoy pleasant sensations.
Self-Massage. No, not because you want to reduce cellulite or because you want to tone down your body, but because you value your body and love it. Rub your tired legs, massage your head. After a shower or bath, rub sunscreen into every cell of your skin.
Sit on a bench and let the warm sun shine down on your face.Sunbathing at the right time of day is healthy and uplifting.
Take a walk barefoot on the grass.Remember Richard Gere’s character in Pretty Woman walking on the lawn?? What’s wrong with you?! Find a patch of green grass in the nearby park, where there is no risk of stepping on the glass or getting your feet dirty, and go ahead.
Yoga or Pilates.It doesn’t have to be a grueling workout. To stretch and give your body a good workout, not to build abs or burn calories. The best way to practice is with meditative music. Such an activity will not only help the body, but also soothe the mind.
Write down your body fun days with specific dates in a special diary.
A manicure or a new hairdo. Every woman knows how a trip to the beauty salon lifts your mood and self-esteem. Take advantage of it to get your mind off the daily grind.
Change your image. Better yet, get a stylist to find a new look that suits your color type and build. If funds do not allow you to update your closet, just choose your favorite outfit (preferably not casual), do a nice makeup and hairstyle and go for a walk or to a restaurant. Dedicate your time to yourself.
Get yourself a photo shoot with a good photographer.Find a beautiful image, get professional makeup and hairstyling. The power of a quality photo shoot is comparable to a visit to a good psychologist.
Start spending money on yourself. Every day ask the question: “What do I want today??”. And spend even a small amount, but on a daily basis. You don’t have to spend a lot of money. It’s not the size of the “investment” that’s important here, but their regularity.
SPA.Ideally, of course, entrust yourself to a professional in some good salon. But you can do quite well and home treatments – do a mask for hair and face, body peeling. Accompany it all with pleasant music and light aromatic candles.
Movie marathon.You can go to the cinema or cozy up on your couch and watch your favorite movies, sometimes interrupting for a pleasant nap. After all, in our time to afford to sleep – a kind of “pampering” too, a luxury that is not available to many.
Go for a bike or scooter ride.
Go to an amusement parkWith all that goes with it – swings, merry-go-rounds, your favorite ice cream.
Organise a picnicAt the park or a trip out of town. A couple of hours or a whole day in nature will give you the rest you need and will energise you.
Organize a hen party. Shopping together, sitting over a cup of tea, or a trip to the bar – the choice is yours.
Dance.If you are shy to dance in public, arrange a dance party at home. Play catchy rhythms or something calm and melodic and let your body move however you want.
Go to karaoke.
Favorite hobbies and new knowledge
Take a workshop.Various studios now offer classes for adults for every taste: painting clothes, sewing underwear, cooking, playing the drums, singing, and more.
Explore something new for yourself.It can be an English course, psychological training, or just an interesting book. The main thing is that in the end you will discover something new, interesting and unexplored. And thus expand the boundaries of your own self.
A good way to pamper yourself –change something in the apartmentRearrange curtains, rearrange furniture, decorate walls with new paintings or other décor. You can buy flowers and put them in beautiful vases.
Throw out something old and unnecessary.
For the mom on maternity leave
The hardest thing to spoil is for moms who stay home and raise small children. But they’re the ones who need the most relaxation. Some moms think that they have no way to afford to relax and somehow distract themselves, because the kids are always with them. Well, you can pamper yourself without taking a break from your maternal role, t.e. Have fun with your children.
Do not deny yourself the little pleasures, even if it seems that blowing bubbles and go to the circus somehow unseemly. Just fool around, laugh and play together with the kids will be very useful. Do not forget that if the mother is happy, the husband and child are happy, too. And every day becomes a little holiday.
Draw. You can do it at home with paints and crayons. Better yet, go outside to draw with crayons on the pavement.
Feed the birds.There’s bound to be a pond with ducks in your neighborhood. If not, a flock of sparrows and pigeons certainly won’t turn down a treat.
Fly a kite.
Play hide-and-seek or catch-up.
If it’s winter, don’t deny yourself the pleasureroll down the slide with the kids or have snowball fights.
At night, read fairy tales. This way the children will fall asleep faster, and you will be filled with tranquility when you go to sleep.
Organize a family partywith board games.
Jump on the bed with your children or have a pillow fight.
Buy gel balloons and launch them into the sky. You can make a wish and tie it to a balloon.
If you have a toddler, just try to make him or her laugh and enjoy a smile.
If you don’t want to limit yourself to this list, do the following exercise.
I love it
It is logical to assume that you enjoy what you love. Try to observe yourself for a week and write down anything that triggered positive emotions, made you happy and made you happier.
Afterwards, write down everything you like on a piece of paper. What’s in it for you? Maybe hiking, reading a book, watching a movie, rain or bright sunshine. Try to write down at least 20 points. Now your task is to do something from this list every day. 1 day = 1 point. If you put on the list, for example, that you love your cat, then take action from that, too – sit quietly and pet it, hold it in your arms, or play with it.
Make the habit of pampering yourself a regular one, so that you can gradually accustom yourself to the idea that you and your desires matter.
So spend at least 30 minutes a day just for yourself. If you use gliders or follow a work schedule, be sure to put those 30 minutes in there. Better yet, put a reminder on your phone. That way, you don’t miss out on time for yourself. How to spend that half hour is up to you. You can use the list or just listen to yourself and answer the question “What do I want now?”.
Anastasia Zaloga’s “Loving Yourself. 50 ways to improve your self-esteem