Psychologists say that children’s fears are caused by a mobile psyche. There’s nothing strange or surprising about it. The nervous system is just being formed, so there may be mood swings, the emergence of fears. In most cases, such conditions pass on their own, without any influence from outside. However, if your child is afraid of everything, you have to do something about it. Psychologist Anetta Orlova says you can not let the situation take its course. Otherwise, there is a great risk that the baby will become withdrawn and stop trusting those around him. And this should not be allowed in any way. It is necessary to act consistently and clearly. Only then will a positive dynamic emerge. If the child has fears, parents should pay close attention to this issue.
Acceptance of emotion
Psychologists advise against running away from existing problems by no means. The most important thing is acceptance, no matter what it concerns. There is no need to turn a blind eye to what is happening, to blame the child for what he feels fear, anger, resentment. After all, when we forbid it, we don’t really remove it, but we focus even more attention on the negative manifestations. A loving parent must teach by example that there are no bad feelings, that people have invented all sorts of evaluation. It would be ideal to get away from all evaluation, to be able to abstract from what is happening.
Knowing how to accept your own feelings and emotions is essential to healthy personal development. Emotional well-being can not be achieved in any other way. Teach your child to understand and recognize their own emotions. It will be difficult at first, but you have to be patient, keep going, and not give up. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Just call things by their proper names, don’t hold back anything. Say, “I feel hurt, sad, and painful in my soul. Over time, your child will learn how to do it. Emotional expression must also be learned. Your baby needs to feel that his parents will always accept him for who he really is. After all, when you do not have to pretend and hide, grow a full person, able to understand their own needs and realize their true aspirations.
Avoid bullying
The worst thing you can think of is to act with threats and intimidation. When a child is already living in fear, it is extremely unacceptable to exacerbate the situation. Sometimes parents, quite unwillingly, can do great harm to their child. It is not necessary to insist on a particular step. Don’t tell him that if he doesn’t come over and meet a peer now, he will always be alone. Do not provoke a conflict just to try to defend your interests.
The task of the parent is, above all, to find the right approach to the child. Do not use intimidation in any way, it is only harmful. Remember that a son or daughter does not have to live up to your expectations. Be consistent in your own steps. Act with caress, be flexible, do not force anything specific. It would be correct to let them make the choice themselves. That’s why children are more willing to learn from their own experience than from someone else’s.
Gentle and tolerant
When phobias get in the way of your life, you need to act carefully and consistently. There’s nothing worse than blaming a child for having certain feelings. After all, negative factors, including rejection and judgment, are not conducive to effective self-transformation. You have to be gentle and tolerant to really get the result you want. Fear often makes a child give up something: an opportunity to defend his or her opinion, to speak in public, to learn something new and interesting.
Careful with restrictions
Some parents make an unfortunate mistake. Realizing that the child is afraid of almost everything unfamiliar, they tend to shield him from anything that may cause moral discomfort or scare. But, it is necessary to understand that the internal tension does not disappear. Your baby is still anxious. In addition, now any unusual situation can knock him out of his rut, deprive him of mental balance. All because he needs to learn about the world around him, and there are certain obstacles to this. Most parents are well-meaning. They have no idea that the consequences can be negative.
But to forbid something means to deprive the individual of the necessary experience, above all, of the desire to make choices on his own. And it is this experience that is most valuable. Imposing bans and restrictions, father and mother think they are choosing safety. But in fact they only make things worse for the child. When others make choices for you, it is not easy to believe in your own abilities, in your own strength. Be sure to keep this in mind.
Art Therapy
Timely processing of frightening moments with the help of drawing will help free you from burdensome experiences. Art therapy is paramount in this matter. Of course, it is necessary to help the child, to direct his or her energy in the right direction. Any stressful condition needs timely correction. Suggest that you draw the actual fear on paper. Let your little one draw it in any way he/she wants, the way it is easier for him/her to imagine it. Provide the opportunity to use colored pencils, choose the colors you like. Refrain from somehow estimate it.
Compensation of fear
In order for your baby to want to change himself, he must understand why he needs it. Of course, loving parents will advise and help in a difficult situation, but you also need to ensure that he begins to understand his own unique value. Real fear must be compensated by something. This is best done by encouraging him to do things that he wants to do. You can see the positive dynamics much faster than if you just praise. Let’s say if a child managed to overcome himself, and he found the strength to make a report in front of the whole class, then buy him a beautiful toy, which he has always dreamed of. If your son or daughter manages to overcome his or her own shyness, reward him or her with a trip to the movie theater. This is how he or she will get a positive reaction. Children need to feel that by overcoming their own complexes, they become stronger and can rise above depressing circumstances.
Interacting with peers
Never, under any circumstances, should you limit the child’s communication with his peers. He must have friends with whom he will spend time and learn something new from them. Even if the baby is very shy, he should not be shielded from everything in the world. On the contrary, he needs to acquire good experiences that will guide him through life, make him strong and self-sufficient. The child should be sent to kindergarten and school, to help make friends in the yard. This will help him or her to trust others in the future, to see the positive traits and qualities of character in people. Moreover, every day communication increases self-esteem and self-confidence. The child begins to realize its own value when he can assert himself in the team and actively participate in discussions.
Gaining positive experience
Any fear can be turned in a positive direction, that is, make it a pleasant experience. How to achieve it? You just need to help your child have a positive experience. This is done by showing existing strengths, which can always be found if one is willing. For example, he didn’t get a high grade in his favorite subject, but he managed to find new friends. For the best effect, you can even make a diary in which together you will mark the daily achievements. Gaining positive experiences will help get rid of a number of fears and pessimistic moods.
Timely encouragement
Fears erode confidence and can cause low self-esteem. That’s why it is necessary to encourage the child. Remember that praise is impossible to ruin. Sometimes timely encouragement will help when the kid is confused and doesn’t know how to act. Encourage him in any way, talk about what he cares and why it happens. Don’t allow the situation to go silent – it is fraught with loss of control and even loss of trust.
Working through frightening situations
When a child gets overtaken by fears, it is very important not to get confused here, and not to stop giving him or her parental support. After all, he needs this more than anything else in the world. Be sure to talk about what really worries him. It is better if the parent looks for sympathy and a benevolent tone. Only then is it possible to cope with all kinds of limiting beliefs and doubts. The negative aspects in each case should be considered separately to draw some conclusions from what is happening. There is nothing sadder than when a person plunges into the abyss of anxiety and yet has no opportunity to express all that he or she feels. Talk in advance about everything that worries your child, even if it seems silly and unnecessary.
Learning self-control techniques
When a parent is timely concerned that he taught his child the principles of staying calm, we can consider that the child is lucky. It’s the right thing to do to help them not get hung up on what’s happening, to follow the direction of the path they’ve chosen. Learning the techniques of self-control may take more than a month, but in the end, it will lead to amazing results. All that is required is not to sit idly by, to make some attempts to correct the situation. Be open to new information. Do not be afraid to act unconventionally, to think outside the box. It is quite possible that you yourself will come to surprising conclusions that will change your life forever. In most cases, if parents begin to control their own emotional state, then the child gradually calms down, becomes more sensible.
So if a baby is afraid of everything, that’s no reason to despair. For parents, it’s food for thought, a reason to reconsider your own attitude toward life, to find new perspectives and opportunities. Fears are natural and there is nothing strange about them. But they often arise from a lack of information, so we must try to compensate for it. the father and the mother as nobody else should pay attention to the psychological condition of the child, to find the true reason for fears. After all, if you let the situation slide, fears can turn into phobias, which are much harder to treat.
